Callousy

i'm confusing . we had been together since last year.my mind crash my heart my feeling.how could i fixed it in the right way.i dunno what can i said .
  with blessing of all the people we should always in blissful status but why i'm not? i feel shock ,my heart never beating this speediness when i saw u now.it is not same feeling as before when u holding my hand or hugging me.but now ,what i can describe in word only [weird].when the time i said weird i knew what is going on.and it is really weird !!! my mind only u can pass .my heart only u can inside .what i trying to say is [love]

i admit some old piece in my mind.i still watching somebody things when u are not around.i checking something about him.my heart beating different when i saw something related with him.i admit his shadow living in my heart deeply.i keep trying to forget.but useless.

  and i getting the feeling with U as it is the feeling when i'm with him.that's love?!99.9% i assure that.the feeling i to U is definitely different than before. i loving u.heart feeling painful when i crying .

trust or love . always make my heart broke.am i going to love?or trust? nope.so far there are nobody be worthy of me.
so why i still loving U?
i just back to the old
and doing my own things
living in the old status

everything will be fine with me,wat im worry for?!
(thks the ways u loving me,caring me BUT pls forgive me i'm not expertly in true love)